I got to create this blog while I was murmuring Britney’s song “Sometimes”.
“Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I’m scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right
Be with you day and night
Baby all I need is times”
That song is about a girl who is bashfully going into love, with all passion and unreasonable fear. She wants to fall in love but somewhat suspicious or afraid. The feeling of “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman”.
I am, too.
I’m not a boy, not yet a real man.
I do want to love, but somehow afraid I would break any heart of beloved ones. I do want to learn, to experience, but the fear of losing confidence affects the way I see. I do want to be the leader, but sometimes I don’t believe in my problem-solving skills. And leadership.
Many things open in my eyes… Where do I go? What should I do to participate in all the stimulating things? I do not want any lesson or advice but only someone to confide, someone easy enough outside but sophisticated inside to realize the complicated me, take my unreasonable fear away, and bring full of confidence to my hand.
I am so delicate, right? It has been long since I found myself like this.
Maybe because of homesickness.
Today after fatigueable class I came to my room alone, turn on the laptop and suddenly see my sister-my dear aunt’s new baby. I remember the kiss of myself for her on the day I left VN. Bright eyes, milk-smell face and some first hair shatter my heart but soothe my soul…
Wow, Ha, you have lots of things ahead. Keep on going. Be active.
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